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And Onto The Next Story ...

12/17/2014

One perk of being a writer: I have some really great imaginary friends. Today I’m hanging out with Tommie. Tommie is Danni’s BFF. Danni is the main character in my recently finished manuscript With and Without You. Every girl needs a good wing-woman, someone who’s got her back, is always there to give her props, call her out on her bullshit, or tell her if her new top is hideous. (The Urban Dictionary definition I like best: A lady who is your closest friend and confidant, whom you can depend on to help you through the hardest times but who is also there to celebrate for the happy times.) As I was writing With and Without You, Danni was of course my favorite character; every main character I've written has a fair share of me in her. But something happened that I know most writers -- and readers -- will understand.

I kind of fell in love with Tommie, and with her budding relationship with bad boy Sean. Tommie has a peripheral story line in With and Without You. Danni is the star. With and Without You explores Danni’s journey after losing her twin brother and searching for a true connection, her first real love affair, though it may be with a man she’s never supposed to have. But by the time that manuscript was completed, I knew I had to find out what happens next with Tommie.

Though Tommie and Danni are best friends, they are in many ways opposites. Danni is sweet, a little naïve, introspective. Danni’s story is an awakening, a coming of age that is both healing and transformative for her. Tommie compliments Danni’s uncertainty, pushing her to test her limits. Tommie is worldly, confident, with boundless energy. Tommie is very sure of herself and her place in the world. Her place in the world at the moment is as an up and coming Sous Chef in Detroit.

When Tommie meets Sean, she at first sees an arrogant, edgy cool artist with a flavor of the week reputation with girls. Sean’s relentless flirting finally sparks her curiosity and she thinks, “Okay, why not?” Tommie assures Danni she knows exactly what she’s getting into, and that if anyone’s going to get hurt, it will not be her.

In order to write Tommie, and the evolving relationship between her and Sean, I have to understand her. I have to know things about her. Things like:

Tommie was raised by a single mom in a not-so-nice neighborhood.

She spent her early childhood being shuffled between babysitters, and occasionally coloring in the lobby of the happy endings massage parlor where her mother still works.

Tommie watched a parade of men in and out of her mother’s life, and vowed when she was twelve that she would never depend on a man.

She has been a ballet dancer since she was three. At 21, she still finds spending time in one of the dance studio’s unoccupied rooms feeds her soul even better than the delicious food she loves to cook.

Tommie loves her city. She loves the food scene, she loves the art world Sean is opening her eyes to, she loves the idea of being part of the rebirth and revitalization of Detroit.

She doesn't “do” stress; that is, when Tommie gets stressed, she doesn't turn inward and agonize over details and implode. She explodes. She tends to take people with her on the way.

Case in point: Tommie’s little Shih Tzu mix, Beast, was tossed outside on an icy, freezing winter night by her mother’s last boyfriend for barking too much. (That dog hated Walt, of course he barked incessantly at him). When Tommie arrived home from her after-school waitress job and found her poor little dog nearly lifeless on the tiny patio, she wasted no time. She didn't stop to seethe and plot revenge or plant seeds of guilt with her too-needy mom. She didn't cry and whine and plead for Walt never to mistreat her dog again. After bundling Beast in her electric blanket, Tommie stormed into her mother’s bedroom and yanked a startled Walt out of bed, his skinny knees hanging like knots on two threads below his boxers as he glared down at her. Tommie pointed her father’s sawed off shotgun at his naked belly and told him to get out. Killing the idea of taking any of his clothing with him, Tommie walked Walt to the front door and out into the snow as her mother pulled and slapped at her. She threw the deadbolt and leaned against the door, shaking her head at her mom while Walt’s shouts faded quickly. She figured he must be running on frozen feet to another apartment, or maybe his car, but she really didn't care.

I need to know these things about Tommie so that when her boyfriend Sean starts getting texts from an old girlfriend, I know what she’ll do, how she’ll behave. I need to know that Tommie holds her self-worth higher than anything a guy can make her feel … or at least, that was the case before the night she and Sean were attacked, and everything Tommie thought she knew about herself and her beloved city is turned on its head.

I need to know what has made Tommie into a fighter, a survivor, but I also know that each of us has a breaking point. And I need to know exactly how much Tommie can give to the man she loves without losing herself.

Gotta love character development. Now, back to the story.

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Holiday Solution (Duh)

12/13/2014

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Me and my Dad, Christmas Past

December. Holidays. No matter what you celebrate this time of year, there’s a universal thread that connects us all. Is it planning? Cooking? Shopping? Fatigue? Searching high and low for that perfect gift? Sprucing up our living space to prepare for guests? Working our asses off to make enough cash to buy enough stuff?

I give you a big, fat nope. It’s not.

The universal thread is love.

Okay. Anyone who knows me knows I’m not a sappy person. My sister inherited the sentimental gene from our dad. My husband and I both feel compelled to cap off lovey text messages to each other with “*gag*” just to be clear that yes, I love your guts, but let’s not get all mushy about it.

But I’m just gonna say it. The point of all this holiday hustle and bustle isn’t all the crap that we fill our houses with in preparation. It’s reconnecting with family and friends (thank you, Captain Obvious).

We are all busy. Life is hectic. Sometimes we lose sight of what really matters. So I’m here to remind you -- and myself and all my loved ones -- what really matters. The people in our lives we are connected to, that’s what matters. Family. Friends we count as family. The people who know you and have to love you even when you have a bad day, are mean or rude or snotty, are too tired to be a good friend/sister/aunt. The people you love just the same even when you haven’t seen them in forever.

What’s that you say? It’s just too hard to pull it all together this year, there’s a mile long list of reasons to just let the holidays pass unnoticed? Get over yourself.

Problem: But my house is too small. Solution: So what. Push unnecessary end tables into another room, add folding chairs, set up a buffet in your kitchenette. Family and friends will be happy to stand and alternate sitting as long as they get to see your smiling face and hear the kids screeching and laughing underfoot. Or convince someone else to host.

Problem: But I can’t afford to host a dinner. Solution: Do a potluck. Make a list of every item needed, including paper products. Assign the ham to that one aunt who never balks at cost or size of contributed dish. Make it byo drinks.

Problem: But I haven’t spoken to her/him/them in a year. Solution: All the more reason to reach out. What better reason than the holidays, and what better feeling to be the person to put the past in the past?

Problem: But it’s too far to travel. Solution: Really? Is it really? Is it an hour or two, or a two day drive? How far is too far to connect with family and friends you love, or even used to love when you saw them three years ago? This is what couches and airbeds are for, people. Obviously it’s not always possible, but stop for a minute and think about the small time investment to see people who have known you most of your life.

Problem: But my house is so run-down (or old or messy or whatever). Solution: Again--really? Who is actually going to care? And, to that one person in the bunch who will judge you because of your dust bunnies and seventies-décor, screw ‘em. No, seriously. Because in spite of your reservations, you’ll be the hero, the one who stepped up and brought everyone together for a day; a day you’ll all remember why you’ve missed each other and why-don’t-we-do-this-more-often.

On that note, I’m going to play the kid card. Our kids LOVE this time of year. They can’t wait to see aunts, uncles, friends, cousins little and big. They can’t wait for the food and goodies and presents, but, as my own kids have told me, they’re mostly excited to spend time with everyone.

Don’t we want to provide our children with the sweet, silly, aggravating, nostalgic kind of memories we have of our own childhood holidays spent with loved ones? As many loved ones as our moms and dads could manage to bring together? And if our childhood was less than perfect, then jeez, don’t we want to give our own kids the kind of holiday experience we always wished we had growing up? I know I do.

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And Onto The Next Story ...

Holiday Solution (Duh)

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